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Shadow Dance FAQ

You may also be interested in Shadow Dance Rules.

People who are interested in Shadow Dance might be interested in this FAQ about it.

Q1. What is Shadow Dance?

A. Shadow dance is a fun way of getting in touch with, owning, and learning to play with your "shadows." Think of a costume party, where everyone dresses up in (sometimes very simple) costumes made up of cloaks of cloth of different colors, masks, and toys. Then imagine everyone improvising together, acting as those parts. That, in a nutshell, is Shadow Dance.

Q2: Dance? Is this some sort of contact improv interpretive dance performance? I don't like the idea of that.

A: It's not a dance, like the waltz. It's more like an improvisational theater, where we are all the performers, and the material we work from are the parts of ourselves we don't normally get to act out. It's more of a "dance" the way a good conversation is a "dance," or the way two excellent performers seem to be "dancing" together in whatever scene they are acting out.

Q3. What is a "Shadow"?

A. We think of the "shadow" as any part of the self that you think is NOT part of yourself, or shouldn't be part of yourself. This might be vengeful part, or a critical part, or a show-off part. But, even cooler, you can also think of any kind of person (or even a thing!) as a shadow--for instance, in Shadow Dances women have dressed up and acted out their "inner Bubba" and been big obnoxious men. Men have been pregant women. People have been "The Planet Earth." Anything that you can think of, you can act out that part of yourself in the shadow dance. Once you let yourself step into the role, and let yourself interact with other people, the words and actions usually show up.

Sometimes owning these shadow parts can be a source of real ephiphanies (I learned a lot about myself when I played out "the perfect woman," for instance). Sometimes it's just flat-out fun (playing inner predators,and "preying" on people, being bossy, judgemental, know-it-alls, prostitutes/players, and so on). And often it's a wonderful combination of fun and growth.

Q4. What happens at a shadow dance evening?

A. We get started at about 7pm. We start by talking about the "groundrules" of Shadow dance. They are designed to keep things in "pretend", and to keep things from becoming "real." We go over (among other things) "stop" words (words that stop the action instantly), no nudity rules, physical safety rules, using the props and general guidlines for acting things out by exaggerating them and keeping them pretend. We also do some short exercises that help people start to "act out" their shadows; as a generalization, it's hard to get started, but once you start, it's really easy and fun to keep going, so we have some ways of "getting into it" that help get that going.In this way it's much like an improv class, like comedy sportz--the start of a scene can be tricky, but once the energy is up, then it's go go go.

Then we all get into costume, if people want to. While some people will go for a specific kind of look, a lot of people just choose "masked" or "weird." Then the music starts, the lights go low, and the "dance" begins. At this point, a lot of first timers start by picking back up the exercises we'd just done, so you can count on having a place to start. One of the cool things about the dance is that if you are thinking it's stupid, or ridiculous in some way, you can own that part, too--I've known a number of men who, for their first few shadow dances, just walked around saying "you people are insane! This is stupid!" As long as the judgements are exaggerated, they can become part of the dance, and that makes them fun.

Q5: Seemingly a shadow dance is all well and good if your shadow is an exaggerated reversed gender role or a hearty pirate, but theoretically, what if you're shadow isn't the dancing type? That is, it seems likely that some shadow personas would be in the range of asocial to antisocial.

A: The word "Dance" is misleading, in that it's not like doing the Rhumba. It's more about having fun exaggerating whatever is present. Asocial and antisocial parts can also be exaggerated and turned into fun. Oftentimes people are antisocial because of judgments they are making about social people. Those judgments lend themselves to being exaggerated and becoming fun. For instance, we've had people who spend a lot of the time walking around, telling people "Anyone who would do this is a total idiot. You look like a fool! You people are morons! Grow up!" over and over, and it gets to be a lot of fun.

Q6: Will I be forced to do anything? What if it starts, and I don't want to interact, or do anything?

A: In every shadow dance there is a section of the room for people to go to if they just want to be with themselves, and not interact. You can always go there to get "out of the action." Also, we will have colored ribbon for people to wear around their heads, if they wish--that means, "I'm in my own world, don't interact with me." We do ask that you stay 'til the end, but if you feel you have to leave, please talk to a leader so we know what's going on with you.

Q7. How long does it take?

A. Shadow Dances tend to go for about an hour. There is music all the while, and people improvisationally interact, as their different parts. From time to time people may chose to change their costumes, or wear no costume (but keep their clothes on!). That's all fine, too. It sounds hokey, but time really seems to operate differently in the Shadow Dances. Much of the time it's hard to tell if it's been a few minutes, or going on forever. The energy of the interactions tend to have their own rythym, their own "rise and fall."

Before the dance ends, the leader will go around and tell everybody, "five minutes more." Then the music will get real loud, and stop suddenly. Then there is silence (we ask before that at the end of the dance, no one talk). This is often a profound silence, like the hush of an audience at a performance, right before they start to clap.

We are looking at something like 7 to 9:30, including intro and breaks and everything.

Then--out for late-night pancakes! Or something.

Q8. Are people going to blab about what I do to everyone in town? That would really suck.

A. We ask that everyone agree keep what happens at the dance confidential. If you need to talk about something, talk to the person whose actions are the ones you want to discuss.

Q9. Is it really such a great idea to live out your shadows? Aren't they shadows for a reason (ie, they are dangerous)? Doesn't Shadow Dance simply "fan the flames" of acting out bad stuff?

A. Most people have never had a place in their lives where they could act out their darker fantasies without there being harsh real-world consequences. Consequently, we repress those parts, and it's sensible to do so under such a system. After all, if you do dark stuff out in the real world, you will feel ashamed, perhaps start believing you are "bad," and be more likely to do that stuff more, in sort of a "I'll show you how bad I can be!" sort of way.

However, in traditional cultures, they often had special times and places where the people could (more or less) safely act out their normally hidden parts, with no real-world consequences.Carnival is such a place. In Benaris (sp?), they had a festival called "feast of fools," where the beggars would become the holy men, and a drunk would be king for a day.There were rules around these festivals that kept them "pretend," so that normally destructive or potenially shameful parts could come out and be lived without causing shame or trouble.

Unfortunately, our culture has few such safety vales, and the ones we have are not particularly well understood. Sports, costume parties, games, are all places where some craziness can be acted out in a fun way, with no real-world consequences. Sexuality is also a place where the "crazy" parts tend to come out to be loved and acted out in pretend (though those parts usually end up getting shamed). But by and large we don't have places to come together as a community and dance our shadows. What luck--that's what shadow dance is about.

So the point of Shadow Dance is that if you truly are owning a shadow safely, in a pretend ("ritual") space, it actually makes you a more "whole person." If that seems like it makes sense, shadow dance may be for you.

You may also be interested in Shadow Dance Rules.